Wednesday, March 03, 2010
{disclaimer}
I don't literally feel like a failure.
I know there are many, many important
and useful things I accomplish in a day
and I'd like to think that, whether I'm aware of it or not,
I contribute positively to the world around me in some way.
But today
as I sit in my messy house
with my needs-to-be-washed hair
in my comfy clothes
listening to my children play a little
and fight a lot
wondering what I'll make for dinner
and staring at a to-do list a mile long,
I feel overwhelmed.
Sometimes I catch myself saying,
when asked what I 'do',
that I'm just a mom.
Just a mom.
Like it's something unimportant and disposable.
Like it's without value or is a casual responsibility.
But I don't really feel that way at all.
And I highly doubt that any of the people
that I choose to associate with or
dedicate my valuable time to
feel that way either.
My job is hard.
It's demanding and rewarding
and sometimes unappreciated.
And yes, overwhelming at times.
Times like today.
When all I feel is guilt for updating my blog
when I could be cleaning my house
or attempting to look like a put-together mom.
When included in my to-do list are several
should have's and need to's
that could be tackled in the time it takes to type this.
But then I remember
that my kids are happy.
They love each other enough to fight a little
and still feel connected at the end of the day.
That they have a mom who, feeling guilty or not,
sometimes avoids the chores so that we can watch
Enchanted for the 30th time together.
{like today}
That they have enough toys to play with
that they can actually make a mess.
That, no matter how long or tough the day may seem,
there's always nap time for at least one of them.
Two at the same time, if I'm lucky.
And that I have the best little helper in town
even if I have to bribe her with quarters sometimes.
{I mean, look at that mug above...
she's sunshine in black leggings}
I've been told that though I can't see it now,
I will achingly miss these days soon.
So today is a messy, neglected and wonderful day
for the Ballard mama and her chickens.
And that, my friends, is
success.
{photos taken by the lovely and talented Mrs. Diana Palmer of Yan Photography.
Many more pictures to come...with the whole family}
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7 comments:
This was precious!
Enjoy your time doing 'nothing' being someone's Mama! ;)
Okay, so I just spent way too much time looking at Yanphoto.com - and I'm officially addicted! I LOVE LOVE LOVE the ones of the couple in the Peery hotel - holy moly!!! She is GOOD. Wow! I am absolutely amazed.
There isn't a better job in whole wide world than that of a MOMMY!!!! Too sweet!
BIG HUGS
AWESOME I couldnt agree more! & you are a AWESOME mom! so freeking talented, smart, & AWESOME thats all there is to it who cares if you dont shower, right!
man...i had a day like that too. and my to do list just keeps getting bigger, and every night i sigh and look at it...and then go watch lost. or american idol. or make some pudding or something. i'm just so tired.
Being a "put-together" mom is highly over-rated! I am sure you were beautiful in your comfy clothes and oily hair...maybe a little stinky...but beautiful all the same!
i love everything about this post... this is one of the reasons i love you so much. because you are honest. with us and with yourself... i long for the days when i will have to ignore the sounds of fighting kids in the other room. i know, beyond the shadow of any doubt, that the job of "mom" is not only the hardest, but also the most important job there is. of course you get overwhelmed and tired. you are raising three gorgeous children and being a wife to a wonderful man! that is more than enough for one person for one day... and add to that all the chores that come along with that "job." your children are so blessed to have a mom like you - one who is loving, creative, smart and wickedly funny. i simply think you are amazing. and gorgeous - unwashed hair and all.
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